Goodbye 2017, Hello 2018

Mara here:

Well, it's that time of the year again. It's hard to believe that this blog has existed for over a year, but here we still are! Thanks to all the readers who have come along on this journey with us over this past year.

A quick housekeeping note: starting in 2018, we are only going to be posting once a week. When we first started the blog, we wanted to make sure there was enough content for people to look back on. Now that it's been a year and we have well over 100 posts, we're going to scale back and only post once a week.

Another more fun announcement is that my mom has a new edition of her book, How to Be Sick, coming out in 2018. So we will have some fun posts about the updated and revised version of the original book that started this whole crazy adventure.

But back to the topic of the post: end of the year. Last year, we shared some light-hearted resolutions—resolutions that we didn't think we would stick to. (I actually stuck to a couple of mine. I only wear my fuzzy pants to jog in now!) 

This year, I thought it might be nice to reflect back on some of the things I'm grateful for from 2017.

For me, 2017 was a bit of a doozy. There were a lot of challenges. There were injuries, mental anxieties, car accidents, missed opportunities—lots of changes.

But there was also so much that I am grateful for.

There are the obvious things: losing weight, going on vacation, my daughter's excellent grades, etc. As always, I am grateful for my husband, Brad, without whom I would literally not be able to survive this crazy world. And I am so grateful for my daughter. She is the brightest of lights in my life.

And of course, I have to mention my parents who are the best. I don't know how else to describe them.

But really what sticks out to me this year is that I feel as if I'm finally coming to terms with accepting who I am. And I'm finally able to understand what's important to me—what makes me feel good.

Part of the challenge of 2017 for me was finally letting go of trying to control my life. That's not to say that I don't have influence over what happens. But I am slowly learning how to let go of trying to desperately force into actuality my pre-conceived notions of how I think my life "should be." 

Does that make sense?

I feel as if for much of my life, I had a mental picture of what a "good life" is, and then I set about to try to make that picture into a reality, but the discord between what I imagined and what was actually happening to me led to a lot of frustration, confusion, and sometimes pain.

But I think I'm finally learning how to truly see—to see with my heart and with my mind's eye. I'm finally understanding better what is real and how I can deal with reality, instead of blindly ignoring what's real and fighting for what turns out to be illusion.

It might all sound a bit fuzzy, but that's because it still is a bit fuzzy for me. I don't know how I feel about all the changes I'm experiencing. And I'm not sure what the end result will be, if there ever really is an "end."

But I feel as if I'm on the right path. I feel as if I'm experiencing more truth than I have before. I feel as if I'm open to more truth than I have been before. And because of that, I'm able to allow myself to feel happiness. I still feel sadness and anxiety. But for the first time in many years, I'm feeling happiness again. Not just feeling manic giddiness or excitement over a temporary success. But I'm feeling real happiness—a peaceful feeling of goodwill. And I'm feeling happiness not just for myself, but I'm feeling it for people around me as well.

And it feels a bit miraculous.

And, for that, I am truly grateful.

As I look toward 2018, I don't feel anticipation the same way I have in past years. I am trying not to have expectations. In 2018, I am going to try and have an open mind and heart. I will be open and grateful for the good that comes. And I will be open and accepting of the bad that comes.


And from the bottom of my heart, with as much grace and sincerity as I possess, I wish you all happiness in the coming year.

***

Toni here:

Wow. It's hard for me to write something after reading Mara's piece. It so honest and so full of hope. It filled my heart with joy to read. It's definitely a hard act to follow, so I thought what I'd do would be to look back at that post from a year ago and see what happened to those New Year's resolutions I made. There were three of them.

First, I actually had the guts to resolve that I'd stop complaining! I said it felt unpleasant and rarely got me what I wanted (both true). Well, guess what? I complained in 2017. If anyone reading this did not complain this year, you have my undying respect!

Second, I resolved to drink two quarts of water everyday, although I admitted that I make this resolution every year but don't keep it. Well, I didn't keep it this year either, but I did drink ONE quart of water every day. That was a definite improvement!

This, I resolved this: "I will go through each room in the house and give half its contents to Goodwill." To my utter surprise, I pretty much did this in 2017. Yay for me! Not everything went to Goodwill—books went to our local library and some things I gave away through a local "Buy and sell" Facebook group (I put a note up about a free convertible sofa and had over 100 people wanting it...there's a lot of need out there). 

I have to admit that one reason I kept this resolution is that my husband and I have to do some drastic downsizing because we're planning to move to a small apartment in the near future. That said, it was freeing to get rid of so many things, and I loved those moments when I'd be going through a drawer and suddenly I'd see a treasured photograph I gazed upon for years.

I haven't made any New Year's resolutions for 2018, but thought, for inspiration, I'd share a piece I wrote in 2011 when I first started writing for Psychology Today: "New Year's Resolutions the Buddha Might Have Made." I re-read it myself every year. 

Mara and I wish the happiest of New Years to you all!